Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Spoilers For Impact This Thursday

So, for the ten people who are still die-hard TNA and want to continue watching the program after their blatant show of disrespect to the fans on Sunday, here are some spoilers. For the rest of the people that don't want to watch the product, but still want to follow it, the spoilers for last night's taping are here as well.

Sting is introduced as the new TNA Champion. I could only imagine how good of a mood Sting is in, considering how pissed off he looked at Victory Road.

And, because it's TNA Impact, that means we can't have an opening segment where Bischoff and Hogan stay backstage. So apparently they come out and state that they can't change what belongs to them. Unfortunately, they can't change the fan's perception of their once-favorite show. Bully Ray -- yes, you read that right -- Fortune, Anderson and Van Dam come out claiming that they want another title shot. Fatal four way match is then set up to determine who will face Sting at TNA's next underselling pay-per-view Lockdown.

Crimson and Scott Steiner defeat Ink Inc. Apparently the Ink Inc. relationship begins to deteriorate more with Shannon Moore seemingly being the heel.

Pope D'Angelo Dinero holds a "healing ritual" that is apparently interrupted by Samoa Joe and Okada, his Green Hornet Kato-rip-off of a stalker/photographer.

Madison Rayne holds yet another open challenge and this time she gets to squash former TNA Knockout Alissa Flash. Afterwards, Hardcore Country Knockout Mickie James challenges Madison to a match at Lockdown for the Knockouts Championship. Madison claims that she will accept if Mickie James will put her hair on the line...oh, great, another stipulation match. Don't do it, Mickie -- you've seen what happened to the last Knockout that put her hair on the line for management.

Jeff Jarrett tries to make a truce with Kurt Angle, who obviously refuses. Chaos ensues, Karen goes for a low-blow, but Kurt's wearing a cup, apparently. Jarrett is split open with his guitar. Kurt wants a match at Lockdown. Jarrett says no. Kurt promises that things are gonna happen that are going to suck harder than an episode of Impact. No, not really. I made that up. It's a fate worse than death apparently, anyway.

The TV title was apparently vacated. I missed this. Jeremy "I Wish Death on Your Family" Borash comes out and announces a triple threat. Gunner -- yes, Gunner -- defeats Murphy and Rob Terry to win the TV title.

Matt Morgan, Angelina Love and Winter defeated the team of Hernandez, Sarita and Rosita. The fan makes a run in again.

AJ Styles vs. Bully Ray vs. Ken Anderson vs. Rob Van Dam ends in a no contest, which means that TNA is screwing the fans yet again. Terrific. Instead of apologizing to the fans for being screwed, it's just business as usual for Dixie and crew. Disgusting.

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